FACEBOOK LOVE

In January I was SINGLE

and my world was without a jingle

and sadly I could not feel a tingle

even as my feet sank in a shingle

and my heart bled in a trickle.

I felt lonely in this my jungle

my face wrapped in a wrinkle

yet in February I still was single.

Then in March her pics I see in a twinkle

her smile the grace of a beagle

as my heart raced to a dingle

though my hands were weak and feeble.

But I scarce could afford to bungle

so in April I decided to mingle...

and it was IN A RELATIONSHIP

for in May I joined love’s ship.

In June we set out for a keep

eager to take love’s leap

none did we allow to peep

as we laughed our enemies to sleep.

Then came the waves of the deep

In July the sail of our love to rip

Without a shred of trust to nip

We strayed slowly like a sheep.

Now IT IS COMPLICATED

cos I got so implicated

her Friend had a booty x-rated

so I added and double dated.

But shorty was so agitated

that in August we became indented.

IN AN OPEN RELATIONSHIP!

At the shores of Menage a Troisship

in September with me as their Lordship

we did zoom off like a spaceship

cos shorty liked her workmanship

And her body was built for worship!

In October our love was like a steamship

It stuttered and spluttered at d gossip

and roared to life in a quick zip!

and three became a crowd slip

And so with haste we scurried

to the altar we went to be MARRIED

and to matrimony we were sent

in November with plenty of time to vent

in the bungalow we paid the rent

and stayed in peace as we were meant

for weeks without a dent.

Then I came home all spent

in December after my trip to Kent

to see her in our tent

the gardener without a cent

with his pole buried in her **nt!

Fast we got SEPARATED

cos that could not be tolerated

But now oh how I hated!

when she said she was sated

ever since the time they mated

while away at work I sweated

to keep her richly sedated

And so in January we DIVORCED

only one year after I toasted

the bit** that got me fried!

Oh! now I am so devastated

but true love is cannot be forced.

With my pain so underrated

as I try to brave unscathed

the betrayal of a wife ill fated!

Now on FACEBOOK when I see my status

I wish I were still a foetus

so this choice of a rumpus

I would have avoided without a fuss!

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